My Operation – Part 1

The Part Of Childbirth And Recovery That No One Talks About

Warning – I am going to talk about some very personal _^girly things in this post, so if you’re of a nervous disposition, you might want to stop reading now. You have been warned…

I’ll be honest, I’ve lost my mojo in the last few weeks. For blogging and social media, housework, cooking, life… I’ve really not been feeling myself. Those who know me personally know that I can be a bit…stroppy sometimes. But even I’ve noticed that I’ve stepped it up a gear these last few weeks. And I think it’s because I’m nervous about an operation that I need to have next week. And this is having an impact on my mental health. So much so that I’ve been feeling similar to when I had depression a few years ago.

Here’s Where It Gets Personal

When Little J was born (just over 18 months ago), I needed to have forceps and an episiotomy. Episiotomy (definitely do not Goggle this word. I made that mistake) is just a fancy word for a surgical incision in your vagina to help get the baby out. Look, I did warn you it was going to get personal. Anyway, it gets worse 😝 (Dad, you might want to stop reading.)

When I was stitched up after the birth of Little J, something went wrong, and it means that I need to have an operation to have it fixed. I’m not deformed down there or anything! (good lord, am I really going to publish this post??) But it means that sex is painful, so they’re going to fix me up. Ooh, I wonder if this means that I’m going to get a designer vagina?

Why Am I Nervous?

I know it’s only a minor op, and I’ll be in and out on the same day. But I’m really nervous about it. I’ve only had one other operation before, which was to have my gall bladder removed. I’ve always had this weird fear that I’m going to wake up halfway through the operation or never wake up at all. Dark, right?

I’m also worried about my recovery. I was not in a good place after giving birth with regards to my lady garden area. I was filled with fear every time I had to go to the bathroom. And I really do not want to go through it again.

Look how cute he is, though! I’d go through it all again for him. I mean, I’d rather not, but if I had to, I would.

So, Why Am I Telling You This?

The reason I’m telling you this is because it’s the part of childbirth and recovery that no one talks about. It’s embarrassing to admit, and it makes me wonder actually how many women have had issues further down the line after giving birth but haven’t been to the doctors out of embarrassment? The fact that 1 out of 3 women misses their cervical screening out of embarrassment makes me think it’s probably quite a few.

When you have an issue, how often do you wait for it to go away by itself, wait and see how it is in a month or so, and just get on with it because you don’t have time to go to the doctors?

Well, I’m encouraging you to go to the doctor and get it sorted. It’s time to put on your big girl pants (the only type that fits me at the moment) and be brave and make that appointment. I’m sharing my story with you (which I find pretty embarrassing!) in the hopes that it will help you.

I’m going to write about my operation and the recovery, so you all have that to look forward to 🤣 You are a lucky lot!

Anyway, I probably won’t post next week as I’ll be too busy lying in bed, watching Netflix, and being looked after by my lovely husband.

Wish me luck!

Read Part 2!