A LOT is going on in the world at the moment. It feels like 2020 alone had more disasters than the last 20 years put together. With the fires in Australia and California, Kobe Bryant’s death, Harvey Weinstein, the murder of George Floyd, and Chadwick Boseman’s death…that’s a lot just there.
Then what about COVID-19? Over 85 million cases worldwide, nearly 2 million people dead. People are being furloughed, businesses are closing for good, weddings and holidays cancelled, schools closing, friends and family unable to meet.
Baring all that in mind, I’m discussing today – Is it okay not to be okay?
Suffering from a mental health issue at any time is not easy, but when there are so many terrible things going on in the world, it may feel like your problems pale in comparison.
However, I want to make it clear – your problems and your mental health are ALWAYS important. It does not matter what is going on in the world. You deserve to get help.
I want to share one of my favourite quotes from the first lockdown with you:
“We are not all in the same boat. We are all in the same storm. Some of us are on super-yachts. Some have just the one oar.’
– Damian Barr
I mean, how true is that? Yes, we are all facing COVID-19 right now, but you have no idea what other people are going through in their own boat.
There could be a single mum working from home, homeschooling four kids, but she might be bossing lockdown. Equally, there might be a single person on furlough, struggling through every day of lockdown as they don’t have anything to occupy them. The point is, we just don’t know.
Please do bear with me as I go off on a bit of tangent here…
One of the major things that would annoy me from lockdown 1.0 would be all the memes that would pop up on my timelines. They would trivialise households without children. Saying things like;
“Is it relaxing?”
“Are there naps?”
“Can you do what you want all day?”
“Imagine being able to sit down and read a book.”
“It must be great to have so much free time to do what you want.”
Why are we assuming that households without children have an easier time than houses with children? We have no idea about their jobs; they might have a high-pressure job requiring them to work long hours, maybe even longer now, due to limited resources at home. They might have to care for a vulnerable family member from their bubble. Or they might be separated from their partner for weeks due to their living arrangements and lockdown ruling.
However, even if these households without children are working shorter hours and can nap, read, cook and chill out whenever they want, who’s to say that their lockdown is easy? They may be desperate for children but unable to conceive. They might have just had their next round of IVF abandoned again. Or they might be suffering from anxiety, depression, panic attacks or OCD.
And please do not think that I am discrediting households with children. I cannot imagine what it is like having to work and care for children and make sure that they are getting something that resembles an education.
However, just because someone only has one child, it may not necessarily be easier for them than households with 2 or 3 children. The child may have special needs or health issues, or other disabilities that we are unaware of.
And Back To My Original Point
Is it really okay not to be okay? I’ll be honest, it sucks having a mental health issue, and I hate it. I have spoken all about my anxieties before, so I won’t delve into those again.
It really saddens me that millions and millions of people struggle daily. I wish I could wash away everyone’s mental health issues, anxiety, depression, OCD, panic attacks, anxiety attacks, eating disorders, paranoia or schizophrenia. But, yes, it is okay not to be okay.
However, what is not okay is to belittle, ridicule or make someone feel bad for suffering from any of these illnesses. What is NOT okay is people committing suicide because they are not getting the help they deserve. Because they felt like they were unable to speak out because “someone has it worse” or “how bad can it really be?”
In Conclusion
Yes, it is okay not to be okay. You are allowed to feel how you feel. It is okay to ask for help if you need it. It doesn’t matter what is going on in the world; if you need someone to talk to, you are entitled to that support.
If you are struggling at the moment, I beg of you, please do not suffer in silence. Talk to a friend or family member. Drop me a message if you want.
However, if you don’t feel comfortable talking to friends or family, I have included some information below.
- Samaritans – Call 116 123 for support 24/7
- Shout – Text ‘Shout’ to 85258 for support 24/7
- Calm – Call 0800 58 58 58 or use webchat for support from 5pm to midnight, 365 days a year
- Mind – Call 0300 123 3393 for support from 9am-6pm Monday to Friday.
- If you need urgent help, you are also able to call 111
Before you go, make sure that you check out my other posts on mental health that may be helpful to you:
- 14 Ways To Look After Your Mental Health
- Putting Together Your Panic Attack Toolkit
- What To Expect From Therapy – My Experience
- How To Support Someone With Depression Or Anxiety
- The Changing Of The Seasons
People are facing battles that we have no idea about. Just be fucking kind. You never know; your text or call might just be what saves them.
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Cover Photo by Anthony Tran on Unsplash
8 comments
So much has happened in 2020. It is crazy, way too many events happened in just one year. I do think it is okay to not be okay. The biggest step is to admit it. I know I got a bit uncomfortable when the lockdown kept being extended. You’re not alone in this either. Thank you for sharing the resources!
Nancy ✨ mdrnminimalists.com
Thank you so much. So much did happen in 2020, sometimes it felt like only COVID happened. I just never thought that we’d still be in this situation almost a year later! xx
Such a great post, this pandemic has definitely affected many persons’ mental health, mine including. I never find it alright when a person belittles someone whose having a struggle or make it seem like it’s not a big deal. I really wished persons nowadays would be more nice and just respectful because you never know what’s going on in a person’s life.
Thank you so much for your comment. Exactly, you never know what people are going through and I think this lockdown has affected people much more than the last two. I just hope that we will be able to get back to some kind of normal sooner rather than later xx
Lisa yet another great post and some great information and phone numbers that will help others to reach out.
Yes another lockdown into the new year another round of isolation for me like thousands of others are doing.
I do believe there’s many people out there struggling and I hope that people are reading these Blogs I for one have found them very helpful 😊
Roll on us getting the vaccine and hopefully we can get back to some kind of normal and perhaps be able to get together again soon 😊
Keep up the great work and be proud of yourself
Lots love
Treacle 🥰🥰🥰 xxx
Thank you so much Carol. I am so glad that you have found my blog helpful. I really do hope that other people find them helpful too.
Hopefully everyone gets vaccinated quickly and we can all go back to some kind of normal xxx
Wow beautiful powerful post. I agree as someone who struggles. Doesn’t find it easy to let my mask slip. But it does help to talk and yes it’s ok to say i am not ok xxx
Thank you very much Mal. It really does help to talk. Hopefully this post will be helpful to other as well xx